As the end of 2018 began approaching, I began to think of all the things I wanted to do differently in 2019. Since making and sticking to resolutions has never worked for me in the past, why repeat that? Isn’t that what the definition of “insanity” is? Thus, an open letter to myself was drafted…

Dear Kara-

I am writing this letter to you as a way to hold yourself accountable for a better 2019 rather than another list of New Year’s resolutions that will fade into the distance after a week. I could sit here and post the 287 things I think you need to work on but let’s go with the top #5 that have bugged you for a looooong time. Here goes:

First on my list is to CALM DOWN. Not everything has to have a DEFCON1 level reaction to it. Some things are just not worth it. You are the only one that can determine what to give attention to and what to pass on. If you can’t change it, why worry about it? If it won’t matter 5 years from now, why give it 5 minutes? Food for thought. Chill out.

Second on the list is DON’T LOWER/DROP YOUR EXPECTATIONS OF PEOPLE. Why should I? I keep hearing “well if you don’t have expectations of people, you won’t be disappointed.” Well, I am. This is where I am going to be more vocal about how someone has upset me and not just let it go. I work better like this…get it out and move on. If they are a repeat offender, this is a good time to determine if you really want them to be a part of your life or not.

Third on the list is STOP ABSORBING OTHER PEOPLES ISSUES AS IF THEY ARE YOURS. You can have empathy, but just like America, you are not the world’s problem solver. Deal with your own sh*t and let others figure out theirs.

Fourth on the list is to KEEP BUSINESS AS BUSINESS AND PERSONAL AS PERSONAL. With a few exceptions along your career path, most people you work with are not your friends. They are business associates and should stay that way. Don’t take the chance of pouring out your soul to someone your work with only to have it come up in the most inopportune time and of course, against you. Leave your personal stuff for the closest of friends.

Last on the list is to MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY AND STOP WORRYING ABOUT EVERYONE ELSE. Do you think for a second someone else is thinking about what YOU think about a decision they are making? Uh, no. Make YOU happy. Your happiness hopefully will be an inspiration for others to follow their path to happiness. Oh, and if you want to cut your hair short because that is truly who YOU are, DO IT!


Happy 2019!


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